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Bruce Bialosky

They Want to Ban Parades

I am not a big parade person, but when you live 15 miles from the Rose Bowl you can hardly miss the Rose Parade. It seems to be on every TV channel. One local channel was almost taken off air because of a cable company dispute with the channel, but we were saved at the last minute so they could show the parade — the channel’s biggest event of the year. While watching it, the thought came to mind as to when will the Left go after banning parades.

You’re thinking right now “Bialosky is either nuts or being satirical”. No, I am neither nuts nor being satirical. There are so many ways that the Left has gone after things in a nonsensical manner and we have lost those items from our lives.

What is more mainstream Americana than a parade? Thanksgiving, 4th of July, The Rose Parade, the parade in Indianapolis before the Indy 500 (yes, it is a huge thing) — all of these are shining examples of American life and all of them iconic, representing everything the Left hates about America.

You think they cannot make an argument for killing parades? You are wrong. The other things they have thought to kill – many of which we never suspected would be a matter of discussion – suddenly are targeted as things we should no longer have in our lives. Parades make messes. They cause tremendous CO2 emissions. All the time spent on these parades would be better spent on the Homeless. There are people who work on these parades who are not properly compensated. They will come up with something. Parade committees are typically white folk from the status quo (except in New Orleans). If so many white folks are behind them then they have to be bad – i.e., white privilege.

We woke up one morning and the largest controversy in this country (other than Trump – always Trump) was straws. Those little hollow pieces of plastic were wrecking the environment. Anyone with a background in science of any kind knows that most plastics take a really long time to biodegrade. Probably not as long as the environmentalists say because no one has actually been able to study plastic products for the projected time some have said they will take to biodegrade back into the environment.

All of a sudden, we are feeling like a criminal for using a straw. And how did this start? It was a nine-year-old. Don’t believe me; read it in USA Today. Milo Cress said we were using 500 million straws a day. A DAY. That soon became the mantra for the environmentalists. Stop the Straw. It did not matter that straws are an infinitesimal piece of plastics disposed. It did not matter that the claims of plastics ruining the oceans did not come from Americans. Sure, we have slobs that discard trash improperly and/or litter. That is a smidgen compared to the destruction being done by Asian countries — particularly China.

Still we have a movement spreading like a California wildfire to limit the use of straws. No science, wrong villains, yet it happened.

The new movement that will certainly spread as quickly is the banning of paper receipts. CA Assemblyman Phil Ting has decided we no longer need paper receipts. Ting told the world receipts cause 686 million pounds of waste and 12 billion pounds of carbon dioxide. Of course, the press just regurgitated those figures without asking for a source. Ting said receipts also expose consumers to dangerous chemicals. Stupid me, I thought the biggest danger from receipts are paper cuts.

They derived their numbers from an article that used the paper calculator: https://c.environmentalpaper.org/contact.html . I spoke to the one person who operates this website and learned it is used by all the environmental groups. I cannot figure it out. Maybe I am just dumb. If you can figure out how they came to their figures, please let me know.

It seems Ting, who represents San Francisco — the city that has driven its Black population out because of sky-high rents — does not know anyone without a proper smartphone. Of course, Ting is against requiring a photo ID to vote, but thinks everyone can show up to a store with a smartphone to obtain their receipt. He should survey the burgeoning homeless population to check if they can get electronic receipts.

Since government entities require receipts if you are subject to an audit, I wonder if Assemblyman Ting has cleared this with the Franchise Tax Board — California’s IRS. Ting also did not mention that Square Inc., a company run by Jack Dorsey (the man behind Twitter) stands to benefit immensely since they have a mobile payments service. Maybe the final bill Ting proposes will require receipts to be no more than 280 characters?

And hot off the presses, they want to ban air conditioning. Articles in Left-wing mainstays the New York Times and Atlantic write of how air conditioning is not only used excessively and unnecessarily and yes, it is sexist. Even when keeping buildings in the 74-76-degree range. You will be seeing more of this soon. Here is a solution all those who have a problem with controlling the temperature of the buildings/homes they are in should forego their air conditioners and heaters. We can wholeheartedly support that.

Straws, paper receipts, paper bags, he/she pronouns, shoes with the original American flag – what is next? All of these ideas were thought preposterous just a short time ago. The Left can always come up with a rationale for a tax. Tell the truth, when you read the headline for this column you believed it. They seem always to be able to plot the necessity for the next cultural change. Why not banning parades? Or did I screw up by giving them an idea?