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Jon Fleischman

Hanretty: Official CA Dem Party Convention Illegal Immigration Quiz

The FlashReport is pleased to present this short quiz, submitted to us by FR friend Karen Hanretty, a communications consultant who, until recently, served as Communications Director of the California Republican Party (pictured to the right).  Any delegates to the CDP convention who are reading the FR today are encouraged to print out this post and distribute it at your convention!

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OFFICIAL CALIFORNIA DEMOCATIC PARTY CONVENTION ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION QUIZ

(Please note that this test is not part of the unfair, biased, mean-spirited high school exit exam.  So pop a Ritalin or a Prozac, relax, and take your time. And please, use a No. 2 pencil.) 

1.  Who called President George W. Bush’s guest worker program to give illegal immigrants the ability to work lawfully in the United States “a magnet for continued illegal immigration?”

A.  Pat Buchanan
B.  Dennis Mountjoy
C.  Dianne Feinstein
D.  George W. Bush

2.  Which Kal-ee-forn-iun complained that illegal immigration places an “unacceptably high burden on my state’s economy, health care, educational and criminal systems, as well as strain other social services and infrastructure?”

A.  Arnold Schwarzenegger
B.  Michael Savage
C.  Dianne Feinstein
D.  George W. Bush

3.  Identify the uncaring xenophobe who had the nerve to say that giving illegal immigrants work permits via a guest worker program would “drive down wages” in the United States.

A.  Dick Cheney
B.  Alan Greenspan
C.  Dianne Feinstein
D. George W. Bush

4.  Carefully point a finger at the member of the vast right-wing conspiracy who proposed tamper-proof ”biometric” visas encoded with irises, palm prints, digitized photos or other identifying characteristics to screen out undesirable entrants into the United States.

A.  Captain Kirk
B.  Captain Crunch
C.  Dianne Feinstein
D.  George W. Bush

If you’re a Republican and you answered “C” to all four questions, you are technically correct. However, you probably had early childhood advantages like privatized preschool that others taking the test didn’t have, so you don’t win anything.  In fact, you owe a “user fee” for every question you answered correctly.  

If you’re a Democrat and you answered “D” to all four questions, we don’t want to say you’re wrong, we’re just saying you aren’t correct.  You know, in the cosmic sense of the word “correct.”  You’re probably shocked to learn that Democratic Senator Dianne Feinstein, who lives in a $16.5 million mansion overlooking San Francisco, doesn’t support an open-border policy or amnesty.  Our advice?  Put down the joint.  Drugs are not the answer. 

Don’t believe us?  Wanna read the facts for yourself?  Go ahead. 

Press Release, Sen. Dianne Feinstein, 2/12/2004


“Feinstein proposes tamperproof visas: Measure calls for ‘biometric’ IDs, denial of entry to students from certain countries,” San Francisco Chronicle, 10/26/01